Blind To Monstrosities I Build My Sanctuary Chapter 3 Shattering The Barrier

-Todd, 16 years ago when I first found you in front of the door steps of the church, I never thought of actually taking you in and raising you by myself, no, I originally thought of just handing you in to the authorities and having them settle the issue, but the moment I took you in my arms and saw your milky white eyes staring back at me as if you knew I was there, I froze in place and couldn’t help but continue staring at you, hehe, its as if at the time you were somehow able to charm me with your blindness, if it wasn’t for that I may have not taken you in as you reminded me of a story written in the scriptures of the church, you must know the story yourself since it is a story I had told you at the very first day of your studies in the church, how the earth mother sacrificed her eyesight for the happiness of its children, you reminded me of this and I took it as a sign from the earth mother that my time has come to groom a successor to the church, to this day remembering our first meeting makes me feel warm but in any case I don’t want to continue blabbering on and continue wasting your time, we need to move fast so Todd if by chance you are still inside the church, then please head towards where all of the scriptures are stored and find a random book with the symbol on it, knowing your curious and clever mind I don’t think I need to elaborate what symbol and if you aren’t inside the church on know where the scriptures are anymore then I have recorded a separate location within your memory where you can find copies of the scriptures you only need to follow the way. I am counting on you my boy, the memory ends here and will only continue once you find the book and the symbol, be well.

-URHGH !

I shouted in pain, the memories or rather the voice of the old man finally stopping as I regained control over my body, still squirming on the ground my head was dizzy and my mind was in disarray.

I could still remember everything the head priest had just told me to the finest detail and highest sounds, some new information even came to my mind telling me of a certain location in Washington, Seattle where I could find a storage house with the needed study materials I would need just case I wasn’t in the church or didn’t have the scriptures anymore, fortunately these necessary as those said scriptures were already very close to me in fact only a few centimeters away.

-What…what was that ?! What is happening ? Was I hallucinating ?! But it was all so real ! God, what did the old man do to me ? What do I do ?

I wobbled on my knees still feeling very shaken from the earlier experience, recollecting my thoughts I had already a basic incline of what was going but at the same time no clue where it was going to lead, there were many questions that needed answering and I knew from where potentially I could get answers from.

-This…

I reached down, looking for the book I had just dropped not too far away, I touched its cover, holding it in both hands I hesitated while stroking it as if considering whether or not I should read it, there were reasons for my hesitation, the most important reason being the fact that I was totally stepping into territory that was way beyond my comprehension and maybe even supernatural, but thinking about my current situation how the world had become completely fucked up a year ago with monsters outside feasting on human flesh, this didn’t seem all too difficult to swallow.

Personally, I didn’t know what to expected or what I really wanted to know. i knew since little that I should never expect something to happen just because I wish for it, being grateful for what you already have is a important virtue to have but at the same time one shouldn’t forget the desire to reach for the stars.

I sighed.

-Old man, you promised we will meet again, you said that a man never breaks his promise…and if you knew you were going to die… why did you make a promise that you couldn’t keep in the first place ?!

Once again, hot tears streamed down my face as they landed on top of my hands staining the book I was holding so fondly, multitudes of emotions whirled inside my body but most importantly I thought of the old man, even though he had tinkered with my memories I was sure that he never changed them as much to really hurt me and simply wanted me to stay away from dangerous things I couldn’t comprehend.

The old was a good person, I was deeply convinced of such, I don’t know the circumstances that led me to being abandoned, most likely my parents left me because they came to know that I was blind and couldn’t bear to raise me knowing that I would most likely become a burden to them, for this I won’t fault them, though I can’t say I won’t resent them.

The old man raised me, this is something I cannot change, I see him as a father but I also know that there exists a barrier between us no matter how much I try to get close to him.

-Will this book be able to break that barrier ? If I open this book will I able to see the old man again ?

I pondered, my hand slowly raising the cover of the book while holding such expectations.

But I stopped.

Feeling as if something clicked within my mind I stopped raising the cover and let it fall down, shutting the book, before making a gentle exhale wiping my tears in the process.

-Huhh…haha…what am I even doing ? I am 20 years old now and I am still relying on a old man ? Even if I am blind that doesn’t mean I am completely useless and unable of taking care of myself, I lived for 1 year inside this hellish environment without getting eaten by those beasts that at least has to count for something right ? And besides why do I need to find the old man ? He already said that we would meet again and just because a recording tells me that he is dead doesn’t mean that he actually kicked the bucket, he was fine and well when he left and since he has those mysterious abilities I doubt he would have any problem surviving this whole mess, overall I have no reason to think that there is something wrong with him just yet even if he didn’t come find me for the past year and even if there was something wrong, thinking about it won’t get me anywhere, I don’t even know where he is much less would it change anything even if I did know where he was, its not like a blind person like me can do anything to help, without power I can’t do anything and even if I had power I doubt the old man would have wanted me to go help him…thats not the reason why he left me or why he raised me, if I really want to help someone…I need help myself first !

I opened the book, a resolution making itself clear within my mind I didn’t hesitate any longer and simply followed what was right and what I should have done from the beginning, I didn’t let the thoughts of the old man bother me anymore, I needed to grow not just in terms of power but in terms of a person..,

-I will never rely on someone ever again…old man when we meet It will be me who you will rely on…

I swore to myself, turning the pages like a madman while counting internally before finally finding the page with the mysterious symbol in it, the moment I turned towards that page though I immediately a stark difference from how it usually looked or rather felt like to my fingertips.

There nothing different in particular in the shape or size of the symbol but instead there was something different..it felt..

-Hot…the symbols its like its on fire ! But it isn’t burning me and neither is it uncomfortable…what is going on ? What is this ?!

I muttered in astonishment, feeling a sudden rush of power go through my veins the moment I touched the burning symbol, it was as if some invisible chains had become unbound around my chest and just as I was about to further inspect the symbol a sudden pain assaulted my mind once again just like before.

But this time I was ready for it, I didn’t flinch neither did I squirm like a worm and instead held my palm to the symbol concentrated on what was going to happen next, and just as I expected I could hear the voice of the old man speaking to me as if he was whispering to my ear.

-Todd, if your hearing this, it means that you have found the scriptures and discovered the mysterious symbol, it also means that your spiritual force that I have sealed in the past has become unsealed, this means that the mysterious symbol you are seeing now has become present to your senses, normally this would be described as the symbol lighting up in bright light within your eyes, but because you’re blind the symbol must be emitting warmth instead that only you can feel, the warmth of the symbol will indicate how high your spiritual force is at the moment, if its just lukewarm to the touch it means that your spiritual force is fairly low, if its very warm close to your body temperature then its means you have moderate spiritual force and if its hot and feels like fire but doesn’t burn or is neither uncomfortable then it means you have high amount of spiritual force, in either case at the current moment you don’t have to worry about it since this is merely a rough estimate, but it doesn’t hurt to keep this in mind since I will now start to go in fair detail about these sorts of things and I am expecting you to listen to them closely even if you will remember them on your own or read about them later within your studies, some things cannot be described in books, my experience will surely help you so listen closely.

The old man explained patiently, I listened just like he asked without making a single sound and only felt with my hand swipe over the symbol that felt like a burning fire, listening to the old man I knew that this sensation I felt from the symbol and how warm it was meant I had this high spiritual force he described, I was still confused about what this “spiritual force” thing was but I knew that he would explain it to me and kept my curiosity at check while also concentration high.

Oddly enough, as I listened I noticed a very distinct and clear difference to how I usually concentrate or thought within my own mind, its as if things had become clearer and my senses had become more refined and detailed, the information I was getting at the moment felt like a torrent of water streaming at me with me being a huge dry sponge absorbing everything in its wake without even sparing a single droplet of water, I knew that this sudden increase of comprehension must have come from touching the mysterious symbol which by the words of the Old man “unsealed” my spiritual force, but never did I think that I could think or feel to this extend.

It was eerily supernatural, it felt as if I had finally stepped into a realm that I couldn’t step away from and me fearful of what was about to come, but at the same time excited for the new discoveries to be made.

-Old man…I finally broke the barrier..but will it be enough…

I unconsciously asked the voice of the old man inside my head, only to realize that it wasn’t actually the old man but just recording, it made me feel slightly depressed but I couldn’t get to me and steeled myself instead listening deeply to the voice of the old man who teaching me like his most prized pupil.

-Now you’re probably wonder by now what I am talking about when I say “Spiritual force”, this is the important part so listen closely as this is the entire basis of your strength and what you will be relying on from now on !

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